I was helping a family whose car was tied up for the day. Their teenage daughter was in town and could spend the night with a friend if dad (mom was at work) could send clothes by me.
"Don't look at me!" I laughed, as he sorted through the clean laundry. "I couldn't get it right with my own daughters."
It is scary to try to please a teenager. If her apparel (and school existence) for a day are in your hands, you are making huge decisions. With help from the 7-year-old daughter ("Dad, those are my panties!"), he settled on an outfit and oversized T-shirt for sleep.
But it wasn't without agony. The most precious gift he gave his teenager was to agonize over something that he knew was so pivotal for her. I read once that adolescents don't mind if their parents sometimes get it wrong--they care most that time was spent on them trying to make the best decision. My friend gave his daughter the gift of living in that tension.
I wonder if God wants the same gift from us: the gift of agonizing over who he is, who he is not, what he means for our life-on-earth existence. We have a teenage need to fit into our adult world; will we look foolish if we dress ourselves as Christ-followers?
Does God want from us the gift of living in that tension? Our decision to accept or reject Christ is so pivotal for him. He gave us the gift of potentially walking away to make even more profound our decision to be all in.
The clothes delivery was met with the sweetest reception. Her eyes lit up and said, "Wow, I was thinking about wearing that very shirt tomorrow!" I told her about his agony in wanting to get it right. She said she was texting him right then to say, Good job.
I like to think, because of his devotion to live in the tension of helping his teenage daughter through her world, that the Holy Spirit gave him a little nudge on the outfit.
Our devotion to figure out the Jesus-thing, when we agonize over what is truth and what we are willing to embrace, may, too, be met with more than a little Holy Spirit nudge. It is our hope to someday hear, Good job.
Thanks, God, for teenagers and tension.
Help us get it right.
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