Look at all the fears we have swirling around us: fear of aging, fear of death, fear of harm to our family, fear of money crises, fear of too much or not enough, fear of rejection.
Someone once told me about writing down every fear she could think of; it took every line of three legal pages. She is not alone.
Sometimes we don't realize that fear is the driver.
We continue in an abusive relationship from someone (a spouse, a friend) or from ourselves (pornography, other addictions). Can fear be the driver: fear of the hardship of leaving the familiarity of the person or the kamikaze comfort of the addiction?
My daily wrestling with fear has given me great compassion for the fears of others. I get it. I have been paralyzed by fear more times than I care to count.
In writing this series, I am blown away by a sudden thought. I have countless conversations in my head with those who believe in evolution because I think they are robbing themselves of relationship. My heart goes out to them but I absolutely respect their position and the power of their belief. So yesterday, in reviewing Julia Layton's article on "How Fear Works" (see July 11th post), I followed her train of thought:
The brain is a profoundly complex organ. More than 100 billion nerve cells comprise an intricate network of communications that is the starting point of everything we sense, think and do...The process of creating fear takes place in the brain and is entirely unconscious...If we couldn't be afraid, we wouldn't survive for long. We'd be walking into oncoming traffic, stepping off of rooftops and carelessly handling poisonous snakes...In the course of human evolution, the people who feared the right things survived to pass on their genes. In passing on their genes, the trait of fear and the response to it were selected as beneficial to the race.I can't reconcile how 100 billion (100,000,000,000) nerve cells that comprise an intricate network of communications were selected if there was no "selector." Somehow I picture the Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta International Airport letting planes come in and out with no air traffic controllers (no selectors) and seeing what jets survive. Everything in our world that has a coherent design has a selector.
So back to my sudden thought: what if we remain immersed in the irreconcilable side of evolution because a fear that God exists is paralyzing our logic?
There are, after all, real reasons to fear that God exists. If he does, then we have to reconcile tragedy and sorrow that might mean evil is real. If he does, then we have to reconcile a relationship with him and how do you do that with someone who is invisible? If he does, then we have to give up the idea that we have done all this (selecting) on our own.
A paralyzing set of fears to be sure.
Layton says the way to treat unwanted fears is to take small steps of exposure. When I expose myself to heights in incremental steps, I can reteach my brain to trust that the video of potential harm (see July 8th post) that suddenly plays in my mind is false.
Could evolutionists check the video library in their minds to see if one or more are linked to a fear that God exists? Are those fear seeds that sprout undetected, in spite of brilliant, scientific thinking?
I have concluded that I can't live in my mind's fear field, viewing the wrong video, missing the delight of the moment.
That is my heart for evolutionists: that they wouldn't continue to view the wrong video, missing the delight of a relationship that might just be real.
Here's to a small step of exposure...courage to risk that there is a selector.
Comments are welcome at feedyourstrength@gmail.com.
